My Beautiful Ray of Sunshine

Naomi Lee Allen-Ward & Xavier Lee Allen Ward

…Happy Sunday

Something interesting happened to me twice this past month. I 

observed two different kinds of people who made me think about 

my own life differently. I felt great perspective after observing 

them for a moment.

The first incident happened two weeks ago at Starbucks in Beverly Hills. A woman came in who appeared to be quite normal in a lovely sundress and flat shoes. She looked as though she was holding a camera in her right hand and she was talking to herself. I thought for sure she was on the phone. She was laughing while she was talking and it all seemed quite cheerful. She stood in line for a few moments but didn't order anything and then she turned around still talking to herself and left. She was clearly a bit mental but I thought that she was lovely. Imagine living in your own bubble,  Where everything is really cheerful and nice. I was envious of her.

Just this morning when I was pumping gas in the valley, a man asked me for change which isn't abnormal for that part of town, but he said something that is still on my mind and in my heart. He said "May I please have some change" and before I could even answer he said "it's okay I'm not like them I'm  different from them." Very carefully and with compassion I said "okay." When I drove off it occurred to me that no one who ends up homeless feels like they are like "The rest of them". I'm sure that anyone who had to endure Those circumstances would be quite estranged from the experience. It's that wonderful gift we humans have where we can be in a depressive circumstance and only see optimism; Only see our demise as temporary and never permanent. 

The repeated truth between these two incidences was that the world is truly the way you see it. Your life is a reflection of your thoughts. The woman didn't want any part of the world she was living in, And the man wanted so desperately to be validated by it; He wanted to be seen.

Three Feet From Gold is what I am currently reading. It is inspirational and forward thinking. I am reading this because I am about to embark on a new chapter of my life. I am relocation, starting up a new company, finishing some writing projects, and there is so much more. In moments of transition like this I think it is important (through some of the chaos) to focus your energy, and although it may seem like reading is taking away from those projects, it actually isn't. Reading (and reading this book in particular) is helping my mind to rest from the hurricane of thoughts I am constantly having, and helps me to focus my energy on something compelling, and intriguing. I am able to refocus and I feel clarity when I go to tackle my own projects.

Three Feet From Gold is about persevering and staying focus and diligent in regards to your passions and talents. It is about staying at it, and not quitting "three feet from gold" It is most fitting for this time in my life.

the saddest thing in the world is 

to watch a most unique, exotic,

 fragrant, and divine creature wilt 

and decay from the intoxication, 

and addiction to another being whose goodness is utterly imaginary....               

"Behold.... the only thing Greater than yourself"...

 My beautiful child

“He looked at her as a man looks at a faded flower he has gathered, with difficulty recognizing in it the beauty for which he picked and ruined it. And in spite of this he felt that then, when his love was stronger, he could, if he had greatly wished it, have torn that love out of his heart; but now when as at that moment it seemed to him he felt no love for her, he knew that what bound him to her could not be broken.” 


- Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

Christine Centenera

My New Obsession...